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Veins

Well yo I'm too normal to be disabled, too disabled to be normal
It's like Catch-22, just don't know what to do
In a social situation I just don't have a fucking clue
Political lyrics I wish I could write but I ain't got the capacity
Try to live my life without bitching but I ain't got the tenacity
Wish I could be like Serj, Zack, Thom, Kathleen or Michael Moore
But this defective gene has made me a selfish fucking whore
A customer's nightmare and a trial to my mother
So petty and small-minded I be jealous of my brother
Autism makes me blind, only see what I wanna see
But can't be what I wanna be cos I wanna be anyone but me
I'm A to the U to the T to the I to the S to the T to the I to the C
The square peg in the hole of society

So I turned out a freak cos O2 was cut off to my head
Which explains why I get nervous when my ma tries to move my bed
Some mofo on the Hole site thinks that I should be dead
Cos I'm a sexually confused retard and easily led
Pick random numbers like 5236
And messing around with bits of string is how I get my kicks
Just please don't get me started on the bombing of Iraq
Cos I'm too blinkered to understand a reason for the attack
I'm too short tempered and moody to chill for too long
That's why I get a panic attack when anything goes wrong
Get hooked on everything from computer games to Space
Thank god I'm not into cocaine or I wouldn't have a face!
I'm A to the U to the T to the I to the S to the T to the I to the C
A square peg in the hole of society

"Hell is other people" as Jean-Paul Sartre said
I'm happy to be left alone with my guitar and my head
But I can see that only when I'm hanging with my homies
In a crowd full of people I'm the only one who's lonely
There's so many people with whom I wanna switch
O forgive me for sounding like a whingeing little bitch
But how many times am I able to resist
Picking up the kitchen knife and slashing my arm to bits?
My family think I do it cos I be desparate for attention
But punishment for who I am is my sole intention
I'm A to the U to the T to the I to the S to the T to the I to the C
The square peg in the hole of society

If I could lose my eyes or my ears I'd forego them for my tongue
And all the fucked-up things that I've ever said or done
I drove my family to madness, caused them only sadness
When I should have wished Jack and Emily luck and gladness
Helen, I'm sorry I yelled at you for scoring the X
And I admit I begrudged you for yr social life and exotic sex
But I love ya and I still want to be yr friend
Particularly when you've lost yr home and at a loose end
And then there's Takesy, I'm scared that he hates me
On a scale of 1 to 10 is it minus 5 he rates me?
I want his approval and I admire him to bits
But when I talk in proximity to him all that comes out is shit
And Rob Taylor, I'm a failure as a best friend, you're a saint
For putting up with my tears and my anger, I know I ain't
Conventional, but it's unintentional to cause you pain
I hope yr faith and kindness to me has not been in vain
I decided at 17 I wouldn't have no kids
Cos they'd wind up either dead or in care if I did
But my autism is my enemy, I've become that much wiser
I'd like to thank it for making me a fighter - sorry Christina
I can make myself improve if only I try
It's too early to leave, I'm not ready to die
Motherfucker, I won't let you bring me down to my knees
I'm the only one who can ward off this disease