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Yes, kids, finally I have a job

A Day In The Life Of Charlotte Holmes, Fax Room Assistant For Brian P Hateley Legal Cost Assessors, age 19.
6:30 - woken up by the screeching of my phone. Wash, eat breakfast, get dressed, put on make up to hide my hideous face.
7:00 - leave house and get bus into town.
8:45 - get train to Liverpool.
8:30 - buy lunch, go to work, make coffee and/or water, try to sort out various pages of faxes into some sort of order.
9:00 - work begins. Play Solitaire when directors are not looking. Log content of faxes onto computer. Give them out to whoever, or alternatively fax them to Bristol or Beverley branches, as lazy twat solicitors have not bothered to find out who works where. Do same with post, if have any time. Give out receptionists' phone messages. Check other fax machines. Take things off the printer. Drink lots of water.
13:00 - eat lunch. Read. Play Solitaire. Go for walk on the Albert Dock if it's nice out.
14:00 - do same as earlier.
17:00 - finish work.
17:15 - get train to Chester, then bus home.
18:40 - come home.
Interesting, eh? Not. When people ask me what I do I answer along the lines of, "Oh, it's so boring I don't want to bore you with the details." The company I work for, in case you're interested (and even if you're not I'll tell you anyway) deals with negotiating the costs of a claim - say someone is in their car when someone else drives into it. The claimant (ie the poor thing whose car got banged into) sues the defendant (the bad person). The cost assessors work with the defendant's insurance company, trying to sort out how much they will pay the claimant's solicitors. A cost negotiator will make an offer, the solicitor will say "Nope that's too low" and will counter-offer, the negotiator will reject it and make another counter-offer, the solicitor will make a final part 47 offer (part 47 of what?) and if the negotiator won't accept it, basically a large amount of paperwork is involved, forms called things like part 8 and N252 and whatnot. Plus I get plenty of whingeing letters saying "Oi, where's my cheque?"
See what I mean?
And why, why WHY do solicitors use the reflexive pronoun (eg "We have not received any correspondence from yourselves")? Sounds professional BUT IT'S WRONG! Don't you know the basics of English grammar, morons? It's from 'you', not 'yourselves'. Christ on a bike.
In other news: Lostprophets are doing Leeds (good), Vicky has gone to Australia (bad), Gina is on Prozac (bad), Nicky and Georgia are still here (bad), Helen has started doing pills (badness itself), Takesy might be going to Glastonbury (good - bastard), the G8 summit today focused on Africa (good, if they actually fucking do something instead of just talking about it).

Comments

( 1 comment — Leave a comment )
fearthemelon
Jun. 2nd, 2003 07:43 am (UTC)
hey gina on prozac=good! Gina not on prozac=vomiting and anxiety attacks!
( 1 comment — Leave a comment )